Alcohol | Every little helps

21 05 2010

The head honcho of Tesco, Sir Terry Leahy, has suggested in the Telegraph that the way to tackle drunkenness and anti-social behaviour is to set minimum prices on alcoholic beverages.

Not long ago, the Government began to hike the price of cigarettes in an effort to ‘coerce’ people to quit.  Not only that, but public money was given to umpteen different anti-smoking organisations to propagate the message that this is all done for our own good.

The unintended consequence has been a 3000% rise in duty-free products being rolled in, rolled up and smoked, with not a penny reaching the public coffers.

Back to alcohol and let us look into the future and imagine that Parliament has enacted the (anti-competitive) price-fixing law proposed by Sir Leahy.

The Political Class are untouched due to the Palace of Westminster’s tax-exempt status.

The Super-Rich are too busy buying £12k bottles of plonk.

The Submissives to the above two will hardly feel the pinch.

The hard-working minority who have less and less disposable income will feel it the worse.

And those chavs and degenerates targeted, now being priced out of the alcohol game turn to their local crack dealer instead.  Robberies, burglaries, rape and murder increase 300%.

Plus, I get to expand my Peckham empire and move into bootlegging and see if I can help ease the 3000% demand.

I swear, one day the Government will give us ration books limiting us to a shot of Victory Gin per lunchtime.

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