Nude Camp | Ouch

30 07 2010

A man joined a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day he took off his clothes and started to wander around the area. A gorgeous blonde walked by, and the man immediately got an erection. The woman noticed his erection, came over to him and asked, ‘did you call for me?’

The man a trifle embarrassed, replied, ‘Er no.’

She said, ‘then you must be new here. Let me explain. It’s a rule here that if  you get an erection, it implies you called for me’ Smiling, she lead him to the

side of the swimming pool, laid down on a towel eagerly pulled him to her and happily let him have his way.

A great start to any day, he thought, and off he toddled to explore the colony’s other facilities. He entered the sauna and as he sat down, he farted. Seconds later, a huge, hairy man lumbered out of the steam room toward him, ‘did you call for me?’ asked the hairy man.

‘Er no,’ said the newcomer.

‘Then you must be new.’ answered the hairy man, ‘It’s a rule that if you fart, it implies that you called for me.’ The huge man easily spun him around, put him over a bench and had his way with the newcomer.

The newcomer staggered back to the colony’s administration office where he was greeted by a smiling, naked receptionist, ‘May I help you?’ she asked.

‘Here’s my membership card. You can have the key back and you can keep the £500 membership fee.’

‘But, Sir,’ she replied, ‘you’ve only been here a few hours. You haven’t had a chance to see all our facilities.’

‘Listen lady, I’m 68 years old. I only get an erection once a month, but I fart 15 times a day. I’m outta here.’

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